AKA "A Companion Piece to "Remembered Impulses"
After such a lovely response and some clamoring for a sequel to my first fic, Remembered Impulses, I mulled over the notion quite a bit. But all that came to me were a series of one-parters riffing off the original story. So I decided to package them as a "companion piece" instead -- a psuedo-sequel, if you will. In it, I play with different points of view from different characters spinning off of that original story. Hope it works.
This first one, I wrote as a one-parter that I thought could stand on its own. I actually wrote it before Impulses, then wrote the longer story because the idea of that moment grew larger than this one-parter in my head.
Oh yeah -- for those that haven't read Impulses, that story takes place as part of a missing scene from Instant Karma!, Season 6, after Audrey & Pacey fight during the night Joey sees Dawson at his movie set with Natasha and then kisses Eddie in the bar. Impulses is a story based around a conversation that Pacey & Joey have in the hallway outside her dorm room afterwards.
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What She Saw From the Door
The room was dark when she awoke, suddenly, as if pulled abruptly from a dream. But she had not been dreaming. Audrey sat up in her bed and groaned. Her head was still wobbly, her mouth felt dry and cottony, and her body ached with the sluggishness of too many drinks in too little time. Yet despite this, her mind was now fully-functioning. Pacey. Pacey had come to her door earlier tonight, contrite and apologetic, after bailing on a night out with her, Jen and Jack to instead go out with his business brethren to a strip club, no less. Granted, he seemed conflicted about it. Truly remorseful. But he said he could not decline the invitation, not to the upper brass of his company not when he had been specifically singled out for the opportunity and he was working so hard to make a place for himself there.
Audrey glanced beside her and saw an indented emptiness. He had been here. Evidence of another human form had compressed itself into those tangled sheets, in the slightly hollowed out pillow, and she could smell traces of the subtle, musky cologne she had given him as a gift last summer lingering there. Where was he now? Did he leave? She stumbled out of her bed and came to stand in the middle of the room. Checking the glowing digital alarm clock perched by Joey's bedside, she realized it was the very wee hours of the morning. And Joey's bed was still made -- untouched and unslept in. Did she actually meet some guy at the bar tonight? Maybe she went home with said guy after her shift? Maybe it was even Eddie? The beginnings of a wicked grin pulled at the corner of her lips. Well, wouldn't that be the end of all things! Bunny indulging in a random one-night stand! Audrey caught the thought and revised it. Bunny indulging in a one-night stand with someone new that was not one Mr. Dawson Soulmate Leery, that is.
Audrey sighed and grabbed a towel from her nightstand, feeling the need to refresh herself. She noticed the door was unlocked, and with knitted brow, she turned the knob and slowly pulled on it. It had opened just slightly when her eyes registered two people sitting on the window bench just down the hallway, talking to each other. In the second it took for her to realize that it was Pacey and Joey, she found herself pushing the door closer to shut, leaving just a small crack wide enough for her to peer through it without either one of them noticing. She did not know what had compelled her to do that -- ordinarily, she would have just proclaimed her presence and sauntered merrily over to join their chat. But there was something in the way they were settled there, in the easy way they were conversing that gave Audrey pause. A casual cocoon of togetherness surrounded them.
They were each ensconced in their own corners on the small bench, facing each other, and there was barely enough room on that bench for the both of them. But they had maneuvered themselves into the space well enough to make it work. Joey's feet were both up, her knees bent, her hands in her lap. Pacey had one leg up on the bench, his knee also bent, and one leg stretched out in front of him, parallel to the bench, probably keeping him from slipping clear off. One arm was flung across its back, a casual fist resting on top of one of Joey's knees. Since Pacey was a naturally affectionate person, much like herself, that detail, in and of itself, did not bother her. Besides, those two had known each other forever. Nevertheless, Audrey felt an unsettling sensation starting at the pit of her stomach.
It was a purely platonic discussion. She could not really hear what they were saying, but she could tell there was nothing untoward going on. And why would there be? she found herself asking. Joey was her best friend. And, that brainy brunette had told her firmly last year, Pacey doesn't cheat. They were laughing suddenly, and Pacey was pushing at Joey's knee, playful. She saw Joey lean over and swat him gently across the top of his head.
"Ow!" she heard him protest, his voice growing loud in that moment. He rubbed his head. "What was that for?"
She couldn't hear Joey's response, but she was grinning and they were teasing each other, an unforced, effortless bantering. It was something she had seen a hundred times since she had known the both of them, and it was something she was sure they had always indulged in across the many years of their childhood and growing up years. And then she saw it. That look. It came out of nowhere -- a crackling connected gaze that could stop someone in their tracks. That could stop a heartbeat. It startled her, and she felt a quick flash of pain. From the look of things, it startled them as well.
When Pacey finally dropped his eyes first, Audrey felt herself let go of the breath she had not realized she was holding. Mesmerized, she watched as Pacey opened his hand to cup Joeys knee and squeeze it. A long moment passed before she saw Pacey glance back up at Joey with a changed look -- less intense and more sweet a little boy smile, pure and almost innocent. Though she had been watching Pacey with a careful gaze just a moment before, Joey suddenly smiled back in kind an easy, answering smile of a little girl and she placed her hand on top of his, intertwining their fingers briefly, gently affectionate. It was an exchange completely devoid of unseemly intentions, yet Audrey felt slammed in the gut. Because it indicated something deeper and stronger, something ever-present, begun from long ago, still underpinning the now.
Audrey closed the door. She could not bear to watch any longer. Because what she saw there, from the door, was something she had not caught onto before, in any of their prior interactions in none of the past banter or mocking insults or tossed-about challenges or even the caring conversational asides or friendly concerned advice exchanged between them in the whole year preceding this one. And, for a brief second, she had reveled in it too, in spite of herself. Because what she saw in that inadvertent moment was real, permanent, and never-ending. It was love, plain and simple the deep, unadulterated love of two people who would always be connected, who could never be apart in their hearts, in their souls, ever.
Audrey crawled back into her bed, dazed. If there wasn't a Joey, could Pacey ever look at her like that? And then she understood -- it was never Dawson, despite Joey's assertions to the contrary. It had always been Pacey. And it always would be, even though she probably did not know it yet, in true Joey Potter fashion. And Pacey? With a sinking heart, she knew a part of him was already coming to the realization that Joey was the one for him. That's why he dropped his eyes first. Because he had too much integrity to pursue that route now. Joey was right, Pacey doesn't cheat. What she did not yet understand was that Pacey would never cheat on her, on Josephine Potter, never in the way it only ever really counts.
So Audrey found herself crying. And when Pacey re-entered the room and came to her, as she knew he would -- because he was not the kind of man to walk away from things, not any more -- when he slid back into the bed behind her and wrapped a comforting arm around her, asking her in a low concerned voice what was wrong, she shook her head and turned to him for his kiss, grabbing consolation from it and clutching him to her, desperate. Because deep within, she already knew it would only be a matter of time that they would figure it out, that they would gravitate toward each other again. What she saw from the door was a new beginning. And for her, an end that had just begun.
**************
After such a lovely response and some clamoring for a sequel to my first fic, Remembered Impulses, I mulled over the notion quite a bit. But all that came to me were a series of one-parters riffing off the original story. So I decided to package them as a "companion piece" instead -- a psuedo-sequel, if you will. In it, I play with different points of view from different characters spinning off of that original story. Hope it works.
This first one, I wrote as a one-parter that I thought could stand on its own. I actually wrote it before Impulses, then wrote the longer story because the idea of that moment grew larger than this one-parter in my head.
Oh yeah -- for those that haven't read Impulses, that story takes place as part of a missing scene from Instant Karma!, Season 6, after Audrey & Pacey fight during the night Joey sees Dawson at his movie set with Natasha and then kisses Eddie in the bar. Impulses is a story based around a conversation that Pacey & Joey have in the hallway outside her dorm room afterwards.
********
Most excellent banner by oxoneflypnayxo
What She Saw From the Door
The room was dark when she awoke, suddenly, as if pulled abruptly from a dream. But she had not been dreaming. Audrey sat up in her bed and groaned. Her head was still wobbly, her mouth felt dry and cottony, and her body ached with the sluggishness of too many drinks in too little time. Yet despite this, her mind was now fully-functioning. Pacey. Pacey had come to her door earlier tonight, contrite and apologetic, after bailing on a night out with her, Jen and Jack to instead go out with his business brethren to a strip club, no less. Granted, he seemed conflicted about it. Truly remorseful. But he said he could not decline the invitation, not to the upper brass of his company not when he had been specifically singled out for the opportunity and he was working so hard to make a place for himself there.
Audrey glanced beside her and saw an indented emptiness. He had been here. Evidence of another human form had compressed itself into those tangled sheets, in the slightly hollowed out pillow, and she could smell traces of the subtle, musky cologne she had given him as a gift last summer lingering there. Where was he now? Did he leave? She stumbled out of her bed and came to stand in the middle of the room. Checking the glowing digital alarm clock perched by Joey's bedside, she realized it was the very wee hours of the morning. And Joey's bed was still made -- untouched and unslept in. Did she actually meet some guy at the bar tonight? Maybe she went home with said guy after her shift? Maybe it was even Eddie? The beginnings of a wicked grin pulled at the corner of her lips. Well, wouldn't that be the end of all things! Bunny indulging in a random one-night stand! Audrey caught the thought and revised it. Bunny indulging in a one-night stand with someone new that was not one Mr. Dawson Soulmate Leery, that is.
Audrey sighed and grabbed a towel from her nightstand, feeling the need to refresh herself. She noticed the door was unlocked, and with knitted brow, she turned the knob and slowly pulled on it. It had opened just slightly when her eyes registered two people sitting on the window bench just down the hallway, talking to each other. In the second it took for her to realize that it was Pacey and Joey, she found herself pushing the door closer to shut, leaving just a small crack wide enough for her to peer through it without either one of them noticing. She did not know what had compelled her to do that -- ordinarily, she would have just proclaimed her presence and sauntered merrily over to join their chat. But there was something in the way they were settled there, in the easy way they were conversing that gave Audrey pause. A casual cocoon of togetherness surrounded them.
They were each ensconced in their own corners on the small bench, facing each other, and there was barely enough room on that bench for the both of them. But they had maneuvered themselves into the space well enough to make it work. Joey's feet were both up, her knees bent, her hands in her lap. Pacey had one leg up on the bench, his knee also bent, and one leg stretched out in front of him, parallel to the bench, probably keeping him from slipping clear off. One arm was flung across its back, a casual fist resting on top of one of Joey's knees. Since Pacey was a naturally affectionate person, much like herself, that detail, in and of itself, did not bother her. Besides, those two had known each other forever. Nevertheless, Audrey felt an unsettling sensation starting at the pit of her stomach.
It was a purely platonic discussion. She could not really hear what they were saying, but she could tell there was nothing untoward going on. And why would there be? she found herself asking. Joey was her best friend. And, that brainy brunette had told her firmly last year, Pacey doesn't cheat. They were laughing suddenly, and Pacey was pushing at Joey's knee, playful. She saw Joey lean over and swat him gently across the top of his head.
"Ow!" she heard him protest, his voice growing loud in that moment. He rubbed his head. "What was that for?"
She couldn't hear Joey's response, but she was grinning and they were teasing each other, an unforced, effortless bantering. It was something she had seen a hundred times since she had known the both of them, and it was something she was sure they had always indulged in across the many years of their childhood and growing up years. And then she saw it. That look. It came out of nowhere -- a crackling connected gaze that could stop someone in their tracks. That could stop a heartbeat. It startled her, and she felt a quick flash of pain. From the look of things, it startled them as well.
When Pacey finally dropped his eyes first, Audrey felt herself let go of the breath she had not realized she was holding. Mesmerized, she watched as Pacey opened his hand to cup Joeys knee and squeeze it. A long moment passed before she saw Pacey glance back up at Joey with a changed look -- less intense and more sweet a little boy smile, pure and almost innocent. Though she had been watching Pacey with a careful gaze just a moment before, Joey suddenly smiled back in kind an easy, answering smile of a little girl and she placed her hand on top of his, intertwining their fingers briefly, gently affectionate. It was an exchange completely devoid of unseemly intentions, yet Audrey felt slammed in the gut. Because it indicated something deeper and stronger, something ever-present, begun from long ago, still underpinning the now.
Audrey closed the door. She could not bear to watch any longer. Because what she saw there, from the door, was something she had not caught onto before, in any of their prior interactions in none of the past banter or mocking insults or tossed-about challenges or even the caring conversational asides or friendly concerned advice exchanged between them in the whole year preceding this one. And, for a brief second, she had reveled in it too, in spite of herself. Because what she saw in that inadvertent moment was real, permanent, and never-ending. It was love, plain and simple the deep, unadulterated love of two people who would always be connected, who could never be apart in their hearts, in their souls, ever.
Audrey crawled back into her bed, dazed. If there wasn't a Joey, could Pacey ever look at her like that? And then she understood -- it was never Dawson, despite Joey's assertions to the contrary. It had always been Pacey. And it always would be, even though she probably did not know it yet, in true Joey Potter fashion. And Pacey? With a sinking heart, she knew a part of him was already coming to the realization that Joey was the one for him. That's why he dropped his eyes first. Because he had too much integrity to pursue that route now. Joey was right, Pacey doesn't cheat. What she did not yet understand was that Pacey would never cheat on her, on Josephine Potter, never in the way it only ever really counts.
So Audrey found herself crying. And when Pacey re-entered the room and came to her, as she knew he would -- because he was not the kind of man to walk away from things, not any more -- when he slid back into the bed behind her and wrapped a comforting arm around her, asking her in a low concerned voice what was wrong, she shook her head and turned to him for his kiss, grabbing consolation from it and clutching him to her, desperate. Because deep within, she already knew it would only be a matter of time that they would figure it out, that they would gravitate toward each other again. What she saw from the door was a new beginning. And for her, an end that had just begun.
**************
. I guess that will never change.
